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When you still live at home, surrounded by other fellow Americans and you see someone put Ranch on their pizza, apologize too many times or go for a long road trip, you think nothing of it. These are just some of the natural things we do in America. It’s part of our culture.

But when you leave the States?

Everyone else just thinks we’re weird! Then they start calling us Crazy Americans because they can’t possibly imagine how good peanut butter and jelly go together and why we need two parking spots for our massive, fuel guzzling trucks.

100 Signs You’ve Lived in Germany For Too Long!

Here is what I’ve learned that Germans, and the rest of Europe find weird about Americans:

  • All Americans are crazy health fanatics
  • Or love EVERYTHING fried
  • We apologize toooo much because we’re too nice that people think we’re being fake
  • We’re too sarcastic too often
  • People put Ranch on EVERYTHING – pizza, fries, sandwiches, meats, salads… (Guilty as charged!)
  • We eat breakfast for dinner
  • Strange combinations – peanut putter & jelly, bacon & syrup, chocolate & peanut butter, ice cream & soda… IMG_6970
  • Everyone sues everyone for everything
  • With alll that plastic surgery, all boobs must be fake
  • We have strange coffee flavors – raspberry, coconut, cinnamon…
  • Americans must be lazy, they have drive-thru everything
  • We always drink our liquor from brown paper bags
  • Call each other by our first names instead of last names
  • Go on road trips longer than 3 hours in one direction in a single day
  • Everything is open 24 hours. Those poor people who work night shift.
  • We find sex, nudity & language offensive, but violence and gore are acceptable.
  • We have a PUMPKIN FLAVORED EVERYTHING season Schloss Ludwigsburg Pumpkin Festival - California Globetrotter
  • We have American flags everywhere… we even wear it!
  • We ask “How are you?” as a greeting and NOT as an actual question.
  • We like ice cubes in all of our drinks
  • Buildings are super cold during the summer with all that air conditioning. How do we manage not to get sick all the time?
  • We have a plethora of options for EVERYTHING
  • Our drinking age is one of the highest in the world
  • We say “Awesome” like every 5 minutes
  • Our food portions are MASSIVE!
  • We have hundreds of prescription ads on TV, warning us against the 50 different deadly side effects.
  • We have an obsession with white teeth (Seriously! My German dentist always wonders why I want to come twice a year!)
  • Cars in America are GARGANTUAN
  • The internal rivalry between In-N-Out and Five Guys IMG_6978
  • We put pickles on the side of our meals
  • What is it with chicken and waffles?
  • We’re LOUD alllll the time!
  • We have an unhealthy addiction to coffee and we take it everywhere with us!
  • What’s with all that water in the toilet bowl??
  • Everything is always ON SALE! Especially on Black Friday!
  • We’re willing to trample people for a new iPad.
  • We’re all workaholics who don’t use our vacation time
  • Thinks everyone has a gun & don’t understand why
  • Why are college tuition fees so damn expensive?
  • Carrying our dogs in our bags
  • Or we put them in doggie wagons (again…GUILTY as charged!) IMG_6968
  • Treating our humans like pets by putting children on a leash
  • We don’t get excited about other international sports like hockey, rugby, cricket
  • But we have a World Series game that is almost completely American
  • Sing the National Anthem allll the time
  • We have our own measuring system the whole rest of the world doesn’t use
  • We CONSTANTLY over tip & it’s confusing
  • People from California must not work with all that sunshine!
  • Americans have 2-4 dogs or cats, or both.
  • We answer the phone with “Hello”, “Ya”, “Hey”, “What Up?”
  • We build our houses out of wood
  • Therefore, they’re easily destroyed during natural disasters
  • We take Engagement pictures
  • You can buy ANYTHING at a Wal-Mart
  • Put BBQ’s on the back of our trucks IMG_6975
  • Raise our trucks so high you need a ladder to get in or our cars so low they scrap the ground
  • The price you see on a price tag is NOT what you pay. Tax is included AFTERWARDS!
  • We dress up our animals
  • Celebrate our birthdays before or after our birthdays and we don’t get cursed
  • We BBQ ALL.YEAR.ROUND. Rain, Snow or Shine!
  • We dress up young girls as Cheerleaders and put them in skirts to dance around at sporting events
  • Prom is a BIG DEAL
  • Donald Trump.
  • We play Football with our hands and Soccer with our feet…
  • We banned chocolate Kinder Eggs with small toys inside, but can’t ban guns??
  • We have an unhealthy addiction to BACON ON EVERYTHING!!
  • Go crAAAZy putting Christmas lights all over our house (Sorry for the bad quality!)IMG_6973
  • Wearing fanny packs and calling them fanny packs without realize the meaning of fanny
  • Cheese…. in a can.
  • We treat college football players like celebrities when other countries think of it as an extra curricular activity
  • Fortune Cookies after eating at a Chinese restaurant even though this isn’t common in China or anywhere else in the world
  • Girls wear shorts in the winter and turn on the heater, or they wear sweatpants in the summer and turn on the air conditioning

…. stay tuned for more!

Other related posts:

Making Comparisons: Germany vs the US

Life in Germany vs. the US

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Replies to CraZy Things Americans Do Europeans Find Weird

  1. I love your list! I miss putting ranch dressing on everything ๐Ÿ™ I actually convinced my Italian husband to try pb&j and now he loves it and tries to convince his friends (unsuccessfully) that it’s awesome.

  2. These are all so funny! I’m very guilty of traveling more than three hours in one direction for a road trip! Heck, to just get across Texas, it might take you 12 hours!

    1. 3 hours is easy peasy! We do it all the time! We even took a 5 hour train in one direction just to go to Dresden for the day and turn around and come home another 6 hours – ok not the smartest because we didn’t spend a lot of time there but hey we got to see Dresden! Haha

  3. Reblogged this on The Flensburg Files and commented:
    What are some pet peeves people have regarding Americans and their habits? Are they similar to the ones posted in this article by the California Globetrotter or do you have some more to add? If so, add them in the comment section either here or there. In the eyes of many Americans, there are some habits that Germans and Europeans have that are considered odd. That article will come soon. But check out this one first…. ๐Ÿ™‚

  4. I’ve always wanted to make such a list! But I can’t agree with the first point, not at all! You are putting fries on the top of the pizzas, guys, and you are thinking that this is healthy… really? ๐Ÿ™‚

  5. This is such a great post! I loved reading about all of the things Europeans find weird. Back at Christmas time, my husband and I were in Germany showing all of the Christmas lights we saw while we were in NYC ( and I remember them stating that they wouldn’t want to pay the electric bill! Haha. And here I was thinking “Oh how pretty!” Not even thinking about the electricity being used.

    Do you do any of these things as an American living in Europe? โ€ฆ like put lights on your house? Or ranch dressing on everything?

    1. Haha yes I do! I sometimes buy a lot of American products online and at Christmas I put up the lights I have – my collection is getting bigger they liger I live here. You can take the girl out of America but you can’t take the American out of the girl! Haha ๐Ÿ™‚

  6. I found the portions in Germany to be just as big as the portions back in the States, but everyone has a different experience. And I’ve never put ranch on a pizza- that’s just weird to me.

    Fun list, though!

  7. Ha,ha,ha, very nice post! I’m originally from Europe and I can attest to some of these “weird” things that you mentioned. I’d say however that Americans put Ketchup sauce on everything, not Ranch. As for being health fanatics, I love that. In fact, I think Europeans started copying us because now everybody runs and rollerblades around the parks in Europe.

  8. as a European I feel this list is mostly accurate ๐Ÿ™‚ I find it weird when Americans pass you in the supermarket and say “excuse me” but most of those differences are actually culturally. Personally, I like Americans just the way they are, including their strange behavior ๐Ÿ™‚

      1. The guy I am referring to walked half a meter from me, that’s what I meant haha. You are right, an excuse me goes a long way when someone wants to get passed you

  9. Spot on! Your first picture of root beer floats reminds me of a discussion I had with a few German colleagues the other week. I tried in vain to convince them that root beer + ice cream is a glorious combination. The response I got? “Yuck! That stuff tastes like medicine. Why would you even add ice cream to it?!”

  10. Although I came here from the #WeeklyPostcard I really had to read this older post instead. I’m German born and live in Australia, my wife IS Australian. I have to tell you Australians seem to perceive Americans in a similar fashion as Europeans do. There must be a lot of ‘uniqueness’ about Americans. Some of the so typical American habits seem to be plain harmful for individuals (we have a friend who drinks diet soda by the buckets and thinks it’s healthy) or harmful for the environment (think of fuel guzzling V8s and freezing air-cons). Others seem to be plain illogical. I didn’t know that Kinder chocolate eggs are banned in the US. What happened to supervision of kids?

  11. Hey Lorelei, new reader here. ๐Ÿ˜‰ Such a fun post! Can totally relate to so much of what you write on your blog. I cover a bunch of the same topics from the perspective of an American in France, so really happy to have found your blog!

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